Permission to Play: Why Having Fun Is Essential, Not Extra

At the end of last year, I realized I needed to work on my relationship with "fun". Having a business, two YouTube channels, and a day job fill up a lot of my time. Any free time after that I would use to spend time with my husband, and our adult kids when they visit us. That really left no free time just for me.

I realized that I was feeling anxious and sometimes resentful that I didn't have play time for myself. I love spending time with my family, but was missing time for me doing things just for me. My husband and I have a designated TV night on Mondays, where that is the time we set aside to watch our shows together. Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday evenings, I am usually working in my business and creating content. Friday nights I usually am spending time with my husband and our kids if they are visiting. On Saturday my husband and I try to make plans to have a day of fun going out together. Then Sunday is left to chores, food prep, and my business projects.

There are shows I want to watch, that my husband isn't interested in. There are events and activities I like doing, that he doesn't. Let's not forget the books and crafting projects I wish I had time to get to.

I made having fun all about my husband and family. I lost sight of me! I love spending time with them and can easily make them a priority. When it comes to myself, I find it easier to neglect. This needed to change! I had a conversation with my husband about the balance I needed to create for myself and he supports it! We have our designated time together and I have designated time for myself. Implementing this more in my life has helped me release the guilt and shame. Like any new habit, it can feel awkward in the beginning.

Cultivating more fun in your life can come through in different ways and doesn't need to take up a lot of time either.

Here are three things I do in my life right now to cultivate more fun:

Joined a community - I became a member of Chapel Of Sacred Mirrors (COSM), which is a beautiful art community near where I live. COSM is the creation of Alex and Alyson Grey, who are visionary artists. I discovered COSM earlier this year and try to go once a month. There are various events, including a monthly Full Moon Ceremony and Art Church event. The Art Church events I have attended helped me develop a deeper sense of self connection to myself. This is a creative and spiritual space, that allows me to pause and reflect and create just for fun! I love connecting with this community when I can. Connecting and participation can also be done online. Click here to learn more about this amazing community and it's offerings.

Learning a new language: For a while I have wanted to learn a new language, but which one and when would I have time? For a couple of years I have discovered I have an interest in Japan and would love to visit one day. In March my son was visiting from college for spring break and was using the app Dualingo. He was having a lot of fun with it and was encouraging me to try it too. I decided to try Japanese on it and have been doing it ever since! This app allows me to learn at my pace. As long at I do at least one lesson a day (which take about 5 minutes) my streak keeps going. At the time of me writing this, I just hit a 108 day streak! Learning Japanese has been another way I have recently been incorporating fun into my life.

Morning walks: Working from home has reduced the amount of activity I get daily, which has impacted my weight and energy. There is a gym in my apartment complex and sometimes I get myself into a brief groove going. It's just not fun and I resist going after awhile. This leads to a guilt shame spiral. At the end of May I joined Conqueror Challenges on their Appalachian Trail quest. Conqueror Challenges are online challenges you can complete on an app. At the end you are mailed a medal of completion. There have various lengths and themes. All you need to do it sync an activity tracker or manually log your activity. You have up to two years to complete a quest. You can also join with a group. Another fun aspect of this is you unlock different postcards on your journey, sharing fun facts about your trip on the trail. This app has made walking for me more fun. I get out most mornings to get my steps in, excited to see my progress unfold. I chose the 2,077 mile version of this quest to complete in 18 months. There is also an 88 mile version. You can check out Conqueror Challenges here.

Are you struggling to have more fun? Check out these journal prompts.

 5 Journal Prompts to Tap Into Fun

1. When was the last time I truly had fun? What was I doing, and how did it feel in my body?→ Recalling this can reconnect you to what joy actually feels like — and how natural it is.

   
   

2. What did I love to do for fun as a child, and which of those things still light me up today?→ Play isn’t just for kids — it’s medicine for your soul, too.

   
   

3. What beliefs do I have around fun? Do I feel guilty when I’m not being “productive”?→ Explore how internalized pressure may be blocking your joy.

   
   

4. If I had a “Fun Hour” every week just for me, what would I do?→ Get creative and let your desires guide you — no rules, no judgment.

   
   

5. How would my life feel different if I allowed more fun, silliness, or adventure into my daily routine?→ Sometimes the biggest shifts come from the smallest sparks of joy.

If you would like more support with this, I would love to help! Click here on my calendar to schedule a complimentary 1:1 conversation. If there isn't a time that works with your schedule, feel free to message me here so we can find another time that works.

Finally, I would love to hear from you in the comments. How do you currently cultivate more fun in your life?